Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Goodbye Vietnam...

Hello all, I am alive and well. Been super busy since last post. I had to cut my Vietnamese explorations short to and head back to Saigon to sort out a visa for this Korean job. Luckily it all worked out and I had a good week in Ho Chi Minh city in the meanwhile.

After my parents left, I befriended several locals who showed me a nice time. I enjoyed the company of some top people (3 girls, 1 guy) whom I met in Dalat who took care of me; taking me out to restaurants, cafes, and sightseeing. Went to the Cu Chi Tunnels which is where the Viet Cong made an underground network of bunkers and rooms where they lived and took down the Yanks. The highlight for me was shooting my first gun on the rifle range. It was an M-14 rifle and I managed to hit the bullseye on the target 100 meters away (after a few shots). Guns are real f**king loud! The kick into your shoulder isn't as bad as you'd think. Also shooting guns makes you feel like a real man; not that I don't normally. It would have made me feel like more of a man if it was possible. It was great hanging out with my new friends and if you are reading this right now, thank you very much.

I also spent a little time in the afternoons with the girls who work at the "massage" parlour out the front of my hotel. They were cool chicks who let me sit around with them when I was bored. They were never busy and just sat around in the alley all day and night. I must admit I enjoyed the attention of a big group of girls in uniforms and short skirts. It turns out that their jobs do not warrant the inverted commas that I used. Their work place only does foot massages... which is proabably why it's never busy. Also right near my hotel was an internet cafe which had some nice girls working there. They took me out for coffee one night and to a club on christmas night... they were a little bit cute too which was nice.

I also got some pimp clothes made. Eventually I chose a material with pink pinstripes for my suit. It sounds gay but looks pretty sharp. I wanted blue pinstripes they were out of stock. All up I got a suit, a shirt, 2 ties and 2 cardigans (You got a problem with cardigans?). All tailor made which sounds great but the materials and the quality could be better... but for $120 USD for everything it's to be expected.

I think I know Saigon quite well now and having Vietnamese blood I think I have a certain connection to the people. I could easily live here one day but at this point I want to be somewhere more exciting and fast paced. It's real nice here and nice is great, but I want to be somewhere that more crazy shit happens. Hopefully Japan will be all I'm hoping for. But first I'll be taking a 4-week detour to South Korea. Why? Because I can. Isn't that great? God bless the English language.

Take it easy.


De Tham St, backpacker district

Internet girls & friends on Christmas night

Feeling the spirit of Christmas and Tiger beer.

Cu Chi tunnels entrance

Me & the massage girls from near the hotel.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Vietnam Pt. 2 (Dalat)

Well I'm back in Saigon for the 3rd time. Trying to sort out my Korean work visa which is proving to be quite difficult due to the fact that I am not applying from Australia and it is hard to get in contact with the camp director as I do not have a phone and she is in Korea. It looks as though it might just work out but dark clouds still loom overhead. Will need some luck to get me through.

Anyways it's nice to be back and have a sense of familiarity in a place so foreign. After Cambodge it was time for us to visit my father's coffee farm in Dalat which he has been visiting during harvest season for the last few years. Finally got to reconcile the difference between my the way I imagined it was and the reality. It's actually very nice... though I was not impressed intially. Very hilly so it is hard to judge the size, it's 60 hectres apparently which is "fookin large init?" [Just finished a Ben Elton book (High Society) so I have a pommy accent in stuck my head.]

It was a relief to my conscience to see that the workers on the farm who get paid roughly $2.50 AUS a day are treated well by local standards. They get paid more than other farms cause it is far from town (28km dirt roads of varying quality) so none of them can get girlfriends, so they pass the time smoking some local plant through a long bong-like apparatus. I don't think they get high from it, but I was a little shocked to see the workers sucking down bongs on their lunch break!

Dalat is a mountain town that has been growing fast cause of the perfect agriculture conditions they have. Its in the central part of Vietnam in the middle of plenty of rainforest and has awesome soil apparently; so plenty of farms growing coffee, fruits, vegetables, flowers and plants. It's also home to many local artists and poets; the beautiful countryside is supposed to be inspiring or some crap. One dude recited his poetry to my parents whilst pissed at a restaurant and gave them a book of it. We arrived midway through the first ever Dalat Flower Festival which was as lovely as it sounds but with no hippies. At night though the party got going in a Vietnamese way: terrible music, innocent dancing, mild drinking and yelling like soccer hooligans.

Most nights were spent at various restaurants entertaining local officials, businessmen & the like. Was an insight into the way the socialist government works over here. It's no wonder that things move slowly, you have to wine & dine the people with power all the time and because the officials can do whatever they want you need to give them a cut on any profits or they just say no to any requests. The fine art of negotiating with these people is to work out how much to give them so they are satisfied, but not so much that they become greedy and start making unreasonable demands. Very fine line which is why my dad has a friend who manages the farm with him who is also the director of the local national park. One night we had dinner with Phung's parents if you know him. His dad is an important man involved with local agriculture, I think he represents Austrade giving aid to Vietnamese farmers.

The old ones and I parted ways as mum had to head back to Australia for Xmas & pops had to go look at tractors or something. So I stayed with my dad's friend and did a touristy tour of the city. All went well until I wandered around at some minority village and lost the rest of the tour group. Eventually I hitched a ride on the back of a schoolgirl's motorbike and found them at the "Chicken Village" after making them 20 minutes late for departure. They were all very goodhearted about it and kept making jokes that I needed 5 buffaloes if I wanted to marry a local girl and from then on everyone kept an eye out for me as I was the only white (sort of white) guy who couldnt speak the local language... was very touching, warm feelings and all that.


Trying desperatley to sort out this visa business so I can let loose for a few days, havent been properly pissed since... actually recently. On Saturday I hit up karaoke with my dad's friend and his work friends. The Soju wine and beer was flowing a definate prerequisite for karaoke. I killed em with "Imagine" by John Lennon and "Superfreak" by Rick James. The karaoke machine gave me 100% for both efforts, which says a lot more about the machine than it does about my singing. No one else got the full marks but they were singing those Viet songs that use those weird notes; the ones that are real irritating.

Hopefully I can sort out this visa business so I don't have to worry about anything. I'm meeting some people for dinner tommorow which should be a bit of fun; now that the folks aren't around I can start to misbehave a bit more. I'd like to raise the rating of this blog from PG to MA at least, if not higher. When I think about it 15 is still a little young, so I'll go for the R rating. Either by adding some sex scenes or using explicit language, one or the other is bound to happen.

[Also check out Tomek's bands new website www.vanshe.com their Ep is worthy and things are looking good for those young upstarts. Also theres a bunch of photo's of Tomek in silly shorts too!]

Tuesday, December 20, 2005


I tried to pat this horse and it turned around and kicked me! Can you believe it! I thought they were meant to be friendly and stuff! Why do parents buy them for little girls? So they can get their heads kicked in?

Me being an idiot.

Pebble art. Never knew.

These guys were killing the illusion for the kiddies. The guy on the left look more like a criminal than an children's entertainer.

"I'm Rick James Bitch!" This is me doing Superfreak. No Hammer dancing though. Pants too tight. "Cause she's a very sexy girl...."

Where the workers sleep. Like all 15 of them!

Workers sorting the beans. Green ones are bad I think.

The greenhouse. Trying to grow vegies, capsicum and shit.

Hows the serenity?

Dalat festival at night. These guys put huge systems on the back of trucks and drive through the closed streets blasting rockabily music. The Viets love it and jump around like crazy. They are easily excited these kids.

Some nice girls who took care of me after my parents left

It's Cambodge in French!

Whats happening my people? I have had enough free time recently to actually start to wonder what's going on in Sydney and yes, miss you a little bit... but not that much. So while your on the web reading this blog, take a minute to drop your uncle Dave an email with some news, plans, hopes & dreams and postal address if you want a postcards or dvd's or something.

Christmas is approaching and I want to feel the love. It is a time for giving & sharing, spending time with loved ones, hot cocoa & milk and a 2nd quarter spike in consumer spending boostering economic activity to counteract contractionary pressures of high interest rates. So in the true spirit of the corporate-sponsored holiday, purchase retail goods and also send me an email.

Another week, another country, this time the lovely Cambodia. Situated in the middle of Vietnam and Thailand it is actually like a cross between the two. There is a strong Indian influence (the people are darker for starters) because it is the halfway point between the India and China sea route, heaps of Hindu temples. I really do like this country, the people are friendly and don't hustle you too much... except for the kids, who cleaned me out. They all come up to you on the street and try to sell you pirated books, every time I left the hotel I'd come back with another book I didn't want, too hard to say no to the little faces.

There are some cool streets filled with French villas converted into bars & restaurants in Siem Reap. But really it's the history that makes Cambodia such an interesting place. The remains of the Ankorian empire provide it's only major industry (being tourism), the French colonisation influenced their architecture and food, their involvement in the Vietnam war & the reigning Pol Pot regime put Cambodia back into the dark ages. All their infrastructure and the whole intellectual population were destroyed. Only since the the U.N. administered democratic elections in 1997 has there been enough political stability for economic progress and for them to open up to the world. Understandably things are still pretty crazy in terms of government. Poverty is rife, and most of the people know someone killed in the mass genocide back in 1975-79. I visited the 'Killing Fields' where there are mass graves and a memorial building filled with shelves of skulls. They also keep the Tong Sleum prison where 14,000 people were kept and totured as a memorial museum as a reminder of the tragedy that occured.

Heavy stuff. Another thing that makes the place great are its sexy girls. In my opinion they are prettier than Vietnamese girls (Thai girls still win it - they are way over quota). But they don't think they are pretty because they have darker skin, which is an advantage for any guy who doesn't have the Asian obsession for white skin. I don't see how anyone can prefer the girls who look ill they are so white over the caramel skin colour of the Indochinese. There are plenty of sexy girls here who value themselves lower than they should; the difficulty is finding ones that don't require money for their services. I met a cool chick who used to be a soap opera actress and we hit it off, but things fell apart after she asked me what my bridal price was so she could get Australian citizenship. I told her I wasnt for sale (besides her offer was way too low!) and she seemed to lose interest. I suspect that her interest in me was not completely genuine.

It's worth visiting the country to see Ankor Wat. These world-heritage listed temples attract 1 million tourist visitors a year for good reason. There are hundreds but it only takes 3 days to see all the good ones. My favourite one is on top of a large hill and has a panoramic view over the major temples and mountain ranges, the best part being that you can ride an elephant all the way to the top. The temples that are over-run with jungle and have giant prehistoric trees growing throughout them are the coolest. Sometimes there are traditional bands playing to add to the atmosphere and seeing monkeys and elephants around always makes me happy.

In other news it looks as though I'll be heading to South Korea at the end of the month to teach at a winter camp over there! My Canadian mate is doing it and so I applied for the same camp. All looks good, just waiting on the contracts to arrive. Otherwise my plan is the same it's just my arrival in Japan will be delayed by 4 weeks. I'm super pumped! Korea sounds cool, and it will be good experience before I rock up in Japan and start asking people for jobs. Rick has had a good time teaching in Korea for the last year and he assures me it's a wicked place.

On unrelated note Asian popstars are hot!!! On television the choices are basically between: terrible asian soap operas which all feature moustache touting idiots or the Chinese Channel V which features pretty girls bouncing around & also pretty guys crooning in that un-masculine way that asians do. Both are very pretty but I prefer the girls over the girly-men. Asian music is genuinely terrible, but occaisionally it sounds a bit like a good song you heard 10 years ago. The redeeming factor being the pristine little girls that bounce around. There's this one pop group of four girls who do a mean cover of Maddonna's 'Material Girl'. I watched an hour long special on them, including a half hour interview which did not understand (couldnt even get the group's name). Intellectual stimulation is overated anyway and easily overlooked. The less processing required the better.

As the prophet Springer says: "Take care of yourselves & each other"

Part of the kings palace

Just walking down the middle of the street, so awesome.

Our wheels & our tour guide

Ankor Wat... the big one

One with faces

One thats in the middle of a huge pond surrounded by stairs

One with mad jungle overgrowth

Taxi...

Another one...

Me & momma at the top of the hill temple

A shelf inside the memorial building, the shelves are stacked 20 meters high

The guards at Tong Sleum prison, kids.

Beggar children at the fields

Thursday, December 08, 2005

The Motherland!

Getting in touch with my roots right now, roots are very important... I like roots. Spent a little time in Saigon (now known as Ho Chi Min city) before heading to the town my father grew up to visit my grandfather. Tis a very strange experience for me seeing what my people are like, Vietnamese have a very distinctive character and compared with Thai culture the differences are definately magnified. It's the little things you know, like what they call a quarter pounder with cheese, but it's also the big things like the way their society works. I only managed to spend 6 nights there before we jetted to Cambodia, so I don't want to make sweeping generalisations before I've spent some more time there. Also I haven't really gotten down with the nightlife as I haven't been able to contact my playboy cousin (the unrelated type) to get him to take me out. He left Australia at my age and never came back, abandoning Oz to live the life of a playboy in Saigon, so he should be able to show me what I'm really interested in seeing.

It's nice to be with the folks again, very comforting after being out all alone (sort of... for a week anyway) in the crazy world. I am a certified momma's boy, a defining characteristic of our generation I think; or maybe it's just a defining characteristic of the friends I have... who knows. Does that say more about the times we live in or my choice of friends? Hmm... Anyway the point is it's cool spending time with my family and not spending time opening my wallet. Just kidding... sort of. My dad gets real excited when he tells me things about Vietnam (being a local and everything) which is great cause he rarely gets excited about anything, quite like myself. So far I have gotten to know district 1 in Saigon quite well, from the rich tourist area to the backpacker area and especially the cheap dvd area. I have scoured the many stores to amass the greatest collection of pirated dvds the world has ever seen!!! (well at least 40 odd movies that I haven't seen yet anyway).

[Authors note: I know this blog is about me but its a bit tedious reading about all the trivial thoughts someone has and I have a tendency to drift when writing about things and just type as I think.. Like right now. So I pledge to write less about what I think from now on cause it's mostly crap]

I found out that my father grew up in a small town called Sadet which is close to Saigon, just on the other side of the Mekong river. Which is where I met my grandfather for the 2nd time, the first being 15 years ago when I was a little tucker. Unfortunately he is in very bad health (being an 85 year old Vietnamese guy is almost unheard of) and was unable to say more than a few words, which I did not understand anyway as I do not speak Vietnamese or French. So we were restricted to non-verbal communication, he was very sick but still had a tight grip on my hand and when he smiled I could see that he knew who I was and I think he appreciated the visit. Sadly I think the end is near for my last remaining grandparent and all his family knows it. But after hearing several stories of the antics that he got up to in his day, it sounds as if he lived a very full and interesting life, which is all anyone can hope for.

He fathered 12 legitimate children (I have heard there are others) over 2 marriages and managed to feed them, put them through school, and even send some overseas (in my dad's case Australia to study which was fortunate otherwise he would never have met my mother) which is no small feat for a man from a small town in a poor country like Vietnam. My father was the first kid from the town to study overseas (god bless capitalism). He definately was no saint though, most of the stories I manage to squeeze out of my dad are tales of greed and debauchery, which made gramps infamous in his hometown. There are tales involving a regular opium-smoking habit, embezzlement, and also at an old age sharing his bed with his 2nd wife and a 19-year old mistress. These details are probably inappropriate for a holiday-blog, but I know that only real friends will check this site anyway.

In summary right now I'm well fed, well slept, well read and well over this hot ass internet cafe. So check back soon to the mildly entertaining adventures of...

(Bum-ba-da-da.... "DAVE TREK")

(Fade Out)

Saigon from the sky.

Me & mother dearest

This crowd formed around these 2 guys who crashed into each other then threw down the fisticuffs... lamest fight I ever saw. No ninja kicks.

Me & poppa g

Love the zoo, Saigon gators.

Happy Hippo!

Smiling elephant